a dreadful turn of events

Once upon a time in a far away land called there existed a young open minded girl. This girl strove to see the world from many different angles and in doing so she occasionally visited reggae night at a local venue. Her and her friends would get dressed in their reggae best every Sunday night, enjoying not only the music but the great company. One fateful evening the open minded girl met a very nice- different, but very nice young man. They spent the evening talking about the nonprofit soccer organization he worked for and her heart just seemed to lift right out of her chest. For the open minded girl was a true sucker for nonprofit works. There was something about the potential of making absolutely no money in the future that really got her going. As the evening came to a close she mentioned that she would email the nice not so young soccer coach for more information because she was sure some of her students would be interested. Any chance use her children to get a little further in her own life was well deserved.

In the early morning hours, before the sun had begun to rise in the darkened sky, the open minded girls car was broken into. The window shattered, her computer stolen as well as a great library book she was in the midst of reading. The girl was saddened by this but knew she had been lucky. Her beautiful purse was still hidden underneath the seat from the night before, in all of her excitement of meeting this nice young man she had forgotten to put her ID away, in which case it would have been more visible. She moved on with a grain of salt, ignoring that perhaps this was an omen that the nice not so young soccer coach was not such a good thing.

As time rolled on they became better friends, regularly conversing on Sunday nights as well as the occasional outting. She enjoyed his company and the feeling seemed to be mutual.

One fateful evening the two of them were enjoying a basketball game, however, the not so young soccer coach was a Lakers fan, which should have been another fairly obvious omen because everyone knows no one REALLY likes the Lakers anyway. When the two of them became closer and kissed everything seemed as expected... that is until he was above her, pulling his hair back... his long, very long, very dirty, very not particularly attractive outside of the reggae environment DREDLOCKS... As he pulled them back into a quasi ponytail the girl realized his silhouette was strangely feminine. Strangely a lot more feminine than she had ever desired to experience. The poor open minded girl was quickly becoming the naive, oblivious girl by missing yet again, another signal to not run her fingers through the dredded mess of hair, and to run for the door.

Then, as if the Gods were fed up with her ignorance, a dredlock landed in her mouth...

according to us

marriage... according to us

1. Leslie
2. Miriam
3. Maggie
4. Deanna
5. Danielle
6. Collene
7. Gemma

now according to the psychic/ scientific methodology of the cake pan

marriage:
1. Leslie
2. Deanna
3. Collene
4. Gemma
5. Maggie
6. Danielle
7. Miriam

babies (haha)
1. Gemma
2. Deanna
3. Maggie
4. Miriam
5. Collene
6. Leslie
7. Danielle

Fairly Fucked Up Fairy Tales

o ladies ... here goes nothing, make sure you have a drink in hand and
fairy tale music in the background...

once upon a time there was a smart girl... she had learned her lesson
not to trust a particular boy named craig, but one day something
terrible happened. She became optimistic. So things rolled on as they
often do and the two of them grew close again. They talked every day
through texts and even occasionally on the phone. She thought things
had really changed this time, and boy was she right. Although unlike
she had suspected , they had not changed for the better.

One day as the girl was driving to work her and the boy got into an
argument, he had decided he wanted a serious relationship with her,
and the girl was taken back. They had not even seen each other in
years and neither one had booked a trip to see the other, only talked
about it. She decided it wasn't the greatest idea and told him she
wasn't ready for something like that. When in actuality she thought he
was insane for even suggesting the idea already. He became very angry
accusing the sweet girl of not caring about him one bit. She was
shocked, how could he think such a thing. She told him it was not the
time because she was at work and decided to address the issue later.

A few hours later she was out with some friends having a few
celebratory drinks, the drinks started talking as they always do and
she decided to send him a text. It read, "i think it would be a good
idea to talk in a few days." Little did she know what was going to
happen next...

The sweet girl awoke on Thursday morning and reached for her phone as
she always did. As she checked the two texts that had been sent to her
in the night, her jaw dropped in horror. The messages were from craigs
number, however, they were from a woman named veronica explaining she
was craigs aunt and he had been in a terrible car accident the night
before and was now in critical condition. The girl jumped out of bed,
requested more information immediately and proceeded to put together a
bag of clothes. She intended to catch a flight or start driving
immediately to be by his side. However, after much reassurance from
the aunt she decided to stay put until there was more information
available.

Throughout the day she worried continuously, checking her phone,
requesting more info, looking at flights. By noon craig was doing
better and was now in stable condition. By evening he was telling the
aunt certain messages to pass on to the sweet girl. She felt reassured
of his safety but was now suspicious of his super human recovery. Was
he really super human? The sweet girl went to bed and decided to deal
with the event in the morning, how dare she doubt the man in the
hospital bed, broken bones, head injury, and internal bleeding.

As the morning sun rose the sweet girl had more messages from the boy,
now he was texting on his own... obviously he had no broken arms :)
she inquired about the hospital the boy was in and he responded with 3
places he was being switched between, obviously doubting the sweet
girls ability to use a telephone. The girl, remembering she was not an
idiot, hopped in the car to go to work and spent her time in traffic
wisely... calling the hospitals. To her shock, or lack there of, he
had never been in any of the three mentioned hospitals... at all.

The sweet girl then and there deleted his number, laughed at herself
for being fooled and went on to grab a glass of wine, a rather large
one.

CHEERS :)